quinta-feira, novembro 18, 2004

Coisas da Literatura - Moon Palace

É do Paul Auster de que vos falo. São do Moon Palace os excertos.

As it turned out, the boxes were quite useful to me in that state. The apartment on 112th Street was unfurnished, and rather than squander my funds on things I did not want and could not afford, I converted the boxes into several pieces of “imaginary furniture.” It was little like working on a puzzle: grouping the cartons into various modular configurations, lining them up in rows, stacking them one on top of another, arranging and rearranging them until they finally began to resemble household objects. One set of sixteen served as the support for my mattress, another set of twelve became a table, others of seven became chairs, another of two became a bedstand, and so on. The overall effect was rather monochromatic, what with that somber light brown everywhere you looked, but I could not help feeling proud of my resoursefulness.

Several days after my visit to the music store, a minor disaster nearly drowned me. The two eggs I was about to place in a pot of water and boil up for my daily meal slipped through my fingers and broke on the floor. Those were the last two eggs of my current supply, and I could not help feeling that this was the cruelest, most terrible thing that had ever happened to me. The eggs landed whit an ugly splat. I remember standing there in horror as they oozed out over the floor. The sunny, translucent innards sank into the cracks, and suddenly there was muck everywhere, a bobbing slush of slime and shell. One yolk had miraculously survived the fall, but when I bent down to scoop it up. It slid out from under the spoon and broke apart. I felt as though a star were exploding, as though a great sun had just died. The yellow spread over the white and then began to swirl, turning into a vast nebula, a debris of interstellar gases. It was all too much for me – the last, imponderable straw. When this happened, I actually sat down and cried.

I slept in the park every night after that. It became a sanctuary for me, a refuge of inwardness against the grinding demands of the streets. There were eight hundred and forty acres to roam in, and unlike the massive gridwork of buildings and towers that loomed outside the perimeter, the park offered me the possibility of solitude, of separating myself from the rest of the world. In the streets, everything is bodies and commotion, and like it or not, you cannot enter them without adhering to a rigid protocol of behavior. To walk among the crowd means never going faster than anyone else, never lagging behind your neighbor, never doing anything to disrupt the flow of human traffic. If you play by the rules of this game, people will tend to ignore you. There is a particular glaze that comes over the eyes of New Yorkers when they walk through the streets, a natural and perhaps necessary form of indifference to others. It doesn’t matter how you look, for example. Outrageous costumes, bizarre hairdos, T-shirts with obscene slogans printed across them – no one pays attention to such things. On the other hand, the way you act inside your clothes is of the utmost importance. Odd gestures of any kind are automatically taken as a threat. Talking out loud to yourself, scratching your body, looking someone directly in the eye: these deviations can trigger off hostile and sometimes violent reactions from those around you. You must not stagger or swoon, you must not clutch the walls, you must not sing, for all forms of spontaneous or involuntary behaviour are sure to elicit states, caustic remarks, and even an occasional shove or kick in the shins.

If the streets forced me to see myself as others saw me, the park gave me a chance to return to my inner life, to hold on to myself purely in terms of what was happening inside me. It is possible to survive without a roof over your head, I discovered, but you cannot live without establishing an equilibrium between the inner and outer. The park did that for me. It was not quite a home, perhaps, but for want of any other shelter, it came very close.

Those were happy moments for me, and they helped to carry me trough some of the darker stretches when my luck seemed to have run out. Perhaps that was all I had set out to prove in the first place: that once you throw your life to the winds, you will discover things you had never known before, things that cannot be learned under any other circumstances.

I was half-dead from hunger, but whenever something good happened to me, I did not attribute it to chance so much as to a special state of mind. If I was able to maintain the proper balance between desire and indifference, I felt that I could somehow will the universe to respond to me. How else was I to judge the extraordinary acts of generosity that I experienced in Central Park? I never asked anyone for anything, I never budged from my spot, and yet strangers were continually coming up to me and giving me help. There must have been some force emanating from me into the world, I thought, some indefinable something that made people want to do this. As time went on, I began to notice that good things happened to me only when I stopped wishing for them. If that was true, then the reverse was true as well: wishing too much for things would prevent them from happening. (…) In other words, you got what you wanted only by not wanting it.

19 Comentários:

Às 30 novembro, 2004 18:31, Blogger flea disse...

Tanto haveria a dizer sobre o paulinho...esse fixe...mas agora não me apetece.

Às 12 fevereiro, 2013 16:21, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hi! I am about to start my own blog and was wondering if you
know where the best place to acquire a blog url is? I am not
even sure if that's what its called? (I'm new to this) I'm referring to "http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=9213734&postID=110074440980858456". How do I go about getting one of these for the website I'm creating?
Thanks a lot

my webpage - germinate
Here is my web blog departure

Às 12 fevereiro, 2013 17:17, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hey there just wanted to give you a quick heads up and let you know a few of
the images aren't loading properly. I'm not sure why but I
think its a linking issue. I've tried it in two different web browsers and both show the same outcome.

My homepage www.hg-nic.com
My web page online

Às 12 fevereiro, 2013 17:27, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hello, I think your site might be having browser compatibility
issues. When I look at your website in Firefox, it looks
fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping.
I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
Other then that, superb blog!

Also visit my web blog - molehill
Also visit my page :: mistletoe

Às 22 fevereiro, 2013 05:28, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Today, I went to the beach with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4
year old daughter and said "You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear." She put the shell to her ear and screamed.
There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go
back! LoL I know this is entirely off topic but I had to tell someone!

Stop by my webpage: removal tree

Às 22 fevereiro, 2013 11:40, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hello! I hope you do not mind but I decided to post
your web site: http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=9213734&postID=110074440980858456 to my internet directory.
I used, "Blogger: Muitas Coisas" as your website headline.
I hope this is okay with you. However, if you'd like me to change the title or perhaps remove it completely, email me at armandoyounger@gmx.de. Thank you.

Feel free to surf to my homepage: los
my page: removal products

Às 22 fevereiro, 2013 17:30, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

It's a shame you don't have a donate button! I'd certainly donate to this superb blog! I guess for now i'll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account.
I look forward to fresh updates and will share this site with
my Facebook group. Chat soon!

Also visit my weblog :: pakerice

Às 22 fevereiro, 2013 18:24, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Outstanding post however I was wanting to know
if you could write a litte more on this subject? I'd be very thankful if you could elaborate a little bit more. Thank you!

my site :: vaga
My site - trake

Às 23 fevereiro, 2013 06:03, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hey there. I'm sorry to bother you but I ran across your blog website and noticed you are using the exact same theme as me. The only issue is on my site, I'm struggling to get the theme looking like
yours. Would you mind contacting me at: donald-halsey@aol.
com so I can get this figured out. By the way I have bookmarked your web site:
http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=9213734&postID=110074440980858456 and will
be visiting frequently. Thankyou!

Feel free to surf to my web blog ... pakerice

Às 23 fevereiro, 2013 09:00, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

My programmer is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP.
I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.

But he's tryiong none the less. I've been using WordPress on various websites for about a year and am anxious about switching to another platform.
I have heard fantastic things about blogengine.
net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it?

Any help would be really appreciated!

my blog post ... los
my webpage :: chemical

Às 27 fevereiro, 2013 06:01, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hello. I'm wondering if you may be interested in doing a website link swap? I see your blog: http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=9213734&postID=110074440980858456 and my blog are primarily based around the same topic. I'd
really like to switch links or perhaps guest author a article for you.
Here is my personal email: poppyhenderson@aol.
com. Please be sure to contact me if you're even slightly interested. Thank you.

Have a look at my web site; http://www.answermetrue.com/

Às 06 março, 2013 18:03, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hello this is kind of of off topic but I was wanting to know if blogs use
WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML.
I'm starting a blog soon but have no coding knowledge so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Feel free to surf to my website ... computer

Às 06 março, 2013 20:57, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hello there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my zynga group?
There's a lot of people that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Many thanks

Also visit my blog post: Recovery
Also see my page :: lost Data

Às 07 março, 2013 12:24, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Gday! I hope you do not mind but I decided to post your weblog:
http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=9213734&postID=110074440980858456 to my online
directory. I used, "Blogger: Muitas Coisas" as your
site title. I hope this is ok with you. If you'd like me to change the title or perhaps remove it entirely, contact me at jaredbounds@web.de. Thank you so much.

Look at my blog post news

Às 29 maio, 2013 09:08, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hey would you mind letting me know which web host you're utilizing? I've loaded your blog in 3 completely different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster then most.
Can you recommend a good hosting provider at a reasonable price?
Cheers, I appreciate it!

Also visit my website advokati

Às 29 maio, 2013 14:13, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Woah! I'm really digging the template/theme of this blog. It's simple, yet effective.
A lot of times it's difficult to get that "perfect balance" between usability and visual appeal. I must say you've done a amazing job with this.
Additionally, the blog loads very quick for me on Internet explorer.
Outstanding Blog!

Feel free to surf to my blog ... easy way

Às 30 maio, 2013 20:46, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Good day! Do you know if they make any plugins to
protect against hackers? I'm kinda paranoid about losing everything I've worked hard on.
Any tips?

Feel free to visit my web site :: backmost

Às 31 maio, 2013 21:16, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hey are using Wordpress for your site platform? I'm new to the blog world but I'm trying to get started and create my own.
Do you require any html coding expertise to make your own blog?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Feel free to visit my page - racing series

Às 02 junho, 2013 04:53, Anonymous Anónimo disse...

Hey! I just found your website: Blogger: Muitas Coisas when I was browsing reddit.
com. It looks as though someone loved your website so much they decided to bookmark it.
I'll definitely be coming back here more often.

Feel free to surf to my web page: Luggage Set For Mg B


Enviar um comentário

<< Home